Heaven (spoiler alert)

I have deciphered another myth: Heaven.

The traditional myths about Heaven allude to a future in which many (but not all) humans become fully digital, abandoning their bodies by uploading their minds to a computer network. The uploadees are willing participants (read: have chosen salvation) who meet a set of criteria (read: have not sinned). Those "left behind" simply continue their human existence.

The principal of storing data on the Internet is referred to as "cloud computing", and in this capacity, the Internet itself is referred to as the "cloud".

How has Heaven always been portrayed?

Clouds.

Heaven is the Internet.

jfkpunk is not a genre

Cretaceous Park

Attention Hollywood:

I have a suggestion for your inevitable reboot of JURASSIC PARK.

It's 20 years after the disaster at Isla San Nebuling, and a new generation of scientists are cloning dinosaurs using the technology pioneered by Dr. Richard Attenborough in an attempt to create a new JP. When news of the project reaches Jeff Goldblum, he rushes to Central America to put a stop to their research (that should eat up about 40 minutes of screen time). Once there, Dr. Goldblum reminds them that in the first movie, the technology preventing the dinosaurs' reproduction was thwarted by the quirky gender-bender frog DNA used in the cloning process.
That's why this time, the clone team (hot young heroes of the film) calmly explain to the elderly Goldblum, we used simple CHICKEN DNA to fill the gaps in the artifact sequence. After all, even in 1993, the evolutionary link between dinosaurs and present-day birds was widely accepted. If they needed modern DNA to bring the dinosaurs to life, wouldn't it make sense to get it from a direct descendant?
Dr. Goldblum doesn't have the answer, and neither do I.

That's all I've got. Also, give triceratops something cool to do this time, and don't go too crazy with the pastels and feathers.

Your friend,
Dan